rosey: Being Trustworthy
Jun 22 2012 at 00:53
out of which emerges a psychologically healthy human being.
Trust is like water to a fish. It gives individuals the freedom to be, to grow, to explore, to
create, to test.
It surrounds growing children with the security they need to find out about their world.
To live is to risk. Trust takes much of the risk out of life, freeing psychological energy
from the survival modality, to be expended in growth opportunities and the building of
Children growing up in insecure environment will through the years become more and more
skilled control technique: anger, threats, withdrawal, lies, force, violence, and the list goes
The result is grownups that constantly test their world to see how much can be controlled.
All because of one missing link during the first few years: trust!
Children who grow up without trust become untrustworthy individuals. Untrustworthy
individuals are often highly suspicious. They project their own lack of trustworthiness onto
others. They become defensive, self-protected, unwilling to risk, selfish individuals who
use and abuse others through control and manipulation, or withdrawal and irresponsibility.
And when they have children, the cycle is repeated.
Trust is the key to good psychological health. When children feel trusted, they can risk
becoming their own persons. Children win by growing up in a secure, trustworthy
environment, and in the process they learn to be trustworthy. Their folks win by having
the pleasure of watching self-confident, respectful, and obedient children grow up to be
responsible and self-controlled.
The key to raising trustworthy children is to model trustworthiness.